I am no stranger to what it takes to survive on this earth. From a very early age, I operated from a state deeply rooted in fear, the primal instinct that drives survival. The peak of this primal survival state for me occurred when I was just 16 years old. Circumstances at home had become unsafe for me and I chose to leave, knowing that I had nowhere to go. I very suddenly, without a plan or any real resources, choose to leave and became homeless. I spent two and a half months living out of the back of my truck and through this time I learned exactly what true survival meant for me. I felt a deep sense of panic with regard to my self-preservation; it penetrated my nervous system and was present in every moment. And the lack of security that I endured became the primary underlying driver of my behavior.

This catalytic event, one of many, was a transformative moment for me. It ensured that I would spend most of my adult life trying to establish the security and stability I’d lost. I managed many accomplishments in this survival state, and the lessons I’d eventually learn were life changing.

These catalytic moments defy prediction, and we all experience them. Over time we learn that change is indeed the only certainty in life. The pulse of our life follows a deeply focused rhythm that periodically undergoes unexpected fluctuations - change. And as we observe closely, we come to see patterns and the anomalies that deviate from those patterns in our lives. In this process, I’ve come to recognize that personal breakthroughs are born from these anomalies, these catalytic events, and that we are not able to learn what’s available for us to learn in these breakthroughs when we are not able to tune in to our inner workings and emotions, our internal world.

It would be many decades before I began to notice my inner landscape and my focus shifted to the desire to calm my nervous system and cultivate a serene inner environment. I eventually dedicated the space, through meditation, to create a calm mind. And over time, I moved from being essentially deaf to the simplest of personal truths, to having access to transformative insight. This insight provided something I could act upon. And as I began acting upon my insight, my life changed profoundly. You see, this insight, and the aligned action taken by me, triggered a mutation in the very fabric of my DNA.

Today, there still exist in some parts of the world a focus solely on basic subsistence, and often, even those who have transcended this primal frequency of survival, still find themselves in the grips of the frequency of fear. For me, as my primal survival needs have been met, I’ve been able to transition from fighting for my place in the world to realizing the profound depths of my own, personal dissatisfaction. This realization constitutes a vital stage in our human evolution and is the space in which more fulfilling possibilities begin to become available for each of us.

This fear that is so deeply rooted in the survival frequency, was intertwined with how I felt. It set up a great dilemma inside me because a great deal of the time I was dissatisfied. The dissatisfaction that was present stemmed from my spending so much of my time trying to create happiness and believing I could do that by focusing on the future. I was entrapped in my desire to create external security, believing that happiness would come from something not yet formed. I envisioned the perfect relationship or making enough money just so that I could relax, or changing my body or my lifestyle, all so that I would feel good about myself… some day.

However, after decades of living for the future, it became clear that nothing outside of myself could fill the void within me. It was only when I accepted my own discomfort in the world that the breakthrough came. To awaken the rebellious spirit within me, I had to confront one of my deepest fears - the fear of rejection by others. You see, inside every individual is a vibrant, rebellious spirit, and it is this spirit that finally begins to awaken when you realize how deafened you have been within yourself.

Our current paradigm of society has been built upon the individual’s desperation to escape the way they feel. So, you see, we are not truly deaf to our inner voice, we are just too preoccupied to listen. But everything we engage in is meant to cast aside uncertainty and discover ultimate serenity. This has the effect of making life more complicated. It creates quite the conundrum because we are expected to have all the answers, to live with certainty, but deep down we know nothing is certain.

Every human being is inherently destined to be a rebel, born to occupy a unique space in the world that cannot be replicated. We are blessed with an unfathomable, spontaneous brilliance that resides within our very essence. Once we awaken to our true potential, the dormant genius encoded in our DNA begins to unfold, gracefully guiding us beyond the realm of mere survival. This magnificent awakening propels us on to the grand stage of service. However, let us shed our preconceived notions of what service entails. True service surpasses serving society alone, it encompasses the greater whole.

The service that you bring in to the world is an act of rebellion against conformity. This rebellious nature emerges as we reject being pigeonholed or stereotyped in to predefined roles in society. This creative contribution of awakened beings does not serve our society directly. Instead, it inspires other individuals to take the same leap of faith and unearth the dormant genius residing within them. This service ultimately benefits the entirety because it consistently disrupts the system, for all systems require periodic agitation to avoid settling in to stagnation.

Rather than dismissing my inner voice, I began trusting and acting on that voice inside, regardless of the outcome. This inner voice, the true self, guides each of us toward our unique purpose and path in life. In today’s fast-paced world, it is easy to get caught up in the noise of external influences. We are bombarded with messages telling us who we should be, what we should believe in, and how we should live our lives. But amidst all this chaos, there is a quiet voice within each of us that knows our deepest desires and truths.

It is through embracing this inner voice, and courageously acting in co-creation, that we can truly find our authentic selves. When we dance to the rhythm of our own inner voice, we become more aligned with our inner rebel, awakened with boundless creativity, forging a new path without concern for its destination. It is when I began to trust my innermost being that those breakthroughs became accessible from the depths of my being. These insights are not seen, but felt; and they manifest as a flood of knowing, coursing through the cells of your body. Consequently, the era of personal truth dawns, replacing the need for collective pseudo-truths rooted in insecurity.

Grimes, Angie. “From the Void To Creation” Expert Profile Magazine, Spring 2024 Edition: 81-82. Print.